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You might be initially overwhelmed by failure of a relationship, a project or any other goal, but when you accept your mistakes and acknowledge your disappointment, you will be able to move on. You can develop a new plan with the help of your realistic optimism, and remember that your long term goal is the ability to adapt and thrive.

Consider each failure a chance to grow wiser and stronger. You may be overcome with despair and disappointment when you feel you have failed. Holding in your painful feelings can affect negatively your relationships, your health and future success.

Notice each emotion you are going through, be it sadness, fear, shame or anger; this will help you work through it without turning it on others or yourself. Take time to process your feelings and do not act rashly before knowing how you feel.

Avoid suppressing painful feelings, as it can lead to health problems such as sleep deficiency, chronic pain and heart disease. Work on accepting what happened once the first shock of disappointment wears off. It will be hard to move forward, if you pretend what happened did not really matter or you blame yourself or others.

Write down everything that happened, the reasons and consequences; state the facts without judgment or blame. If you do not prefer writhing about it, find a trusted friend, family member or a counselor to talk about it; this will help move past denial. If you are unable to move past denial, examine what is holding you back and what you are afraid of.

Identify your fears that are excessive or irrational; do you feel that you are being judged or you are the only one that experienced this failure? Do you feel that failure calls your capability and intelligence into question? Do you worry that everyone will be disappointed at you when you do not succeed?


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